


Silmarillion: Facebook Edition

by CrystalNavy



Series: Silmarilion: Online Edition [1]
Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Crack, Gen, Humor, Parody
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-04
Updated: 2020-03-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:15:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23014615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrystalNavy/pseuds/CrystalNavy
Summary: Silm, CoH and Akkalabeth characters on Facebook.
Series: Silmarilion: Online Edition [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1654144
Comments: 3
Kudos: 13





	1. Valar

Eru has created the Universe. It's pretty.

The Valar liked this

Melkor disliked this

Melkor: Mine!

Manwe: Actually, we helped create this.

Varda: And now we'll live there.

Melkor: Then I will live there too.

Manwe: I call dibs on being Lord of Winds and head honcho.

Varda: Lady of Stars

Orome: Lord of Forests and Hunting.

Namo: Lord of the Dead.

Irmo: Lord of Dreams

Este: Lady of Healing

Vaire: Lady of Weaving.

Nienna: Lady of Mourning and Pity.

Aule: Lord of Metal and Smithcraft.

Yavanna: Lady of Plants and Trees.

Melkor: Lord of Chaos.

Manwe: You don't count, Melkor.

Melkor: Sure I do. I have as much right as any of you to do this.


	2. Feanor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feanor has issues.

Feanor: Is born

Finwe liked this

Miriel liked this

Miriel has posted a life event: Dead

Finwe disliked this

Feanor disliked this

Finwe: :(

Finwe and Indis are in a relationship.

Finwe liked this

Indis liked this

Feanor disliked this

Fingolfin: Is born

Finarfin: Is born

Feanor has posted a life event: Ran away from home

Finwe disliked this

Feanor and Nerdanel are in a relationship.

Finwe: When did that happen?

Feanor has shared a life event: Married

Nerdanel has shared a life event: Married

Feanor has posted a picture.

[picture of Silmarili]

Feanor: Look at my newest creations!

Melkor liked this

Sauron liked this.

Melkor: Mine!

Feanor: I've just been visited by Melkor. A really nice God. Wanted to be my friend and everything.

Finwe dislikes this

Finwe: Don't trust him.

Feanor: Why? What harm could he do?

Fingolfin: Father, my brother needs to chill. Make it happen.

Feanor: That does it. You. Me. Outside.

Fingolfin has shared a life event: Wounded

Feanor likes this

Manwe dislikes this

Finwe dislikes this

Manwe: What's the meaning of this?

Feanor has shared a life event: Exiled

Melkor likes this

Sauron likes this

Finwe dislikes this

Finwe has shared a life event: Is no longer King

Fingolfin has shared a life event: Is King regent now

Finwe: I will not remain King while my son is in exile.


	3. Feanor and Melkor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feanor and Melkor shenanigans

Feanor changed locations to Formenos

Finwe changed locations to Formenos

Maedhros changed locations to Formenos

Maglor changed locations to Formenos

Celegorm changed locations to Formenos

Caranthir changed locations to Formenos

Curufin changed locations to Formenos

Amrod changed locations to Formenos

Amras changed locations to Formenos

Huan changed locations to Formenos

Nerdanel changed her relationship status to 'single'.

Feanor disliked this

Feanor: No. Please, no.

Nerdanel: We're drifting apart, and you know it. It's best to quit while we're ahead.

Feanor: You're breaking my heart. :(

Nerdanel: Why? You clearly care about your jewels more than about me, so you might as well be married to them instead.

Feanor: Please..... :(

Nerdanel has blocked Feanor

Feanor: :(

Melkor updated his status to Visiting Formenos

Melkor: So, I heard you were down, so I came to cheer you up. There are vast lands across the sea, filled with wonder and new opportunities. I can help your family get to those lands.

Feanor: I'll think about it.

Melkor: Take as long as you like, but remember that your Silmarils won't be safe anywhere in Aman.

Feanor: .......

Melkor: ???

Feanor: I see it now. You want them. Well, you won't have them. Go away and never come back.

Feanor updated his status to Just slammed the door in the face of the most powerful being in Ea

Melkor updated his status to Wants revenge

Ungoliant: You hiring?


End file.
